When we embrace the intricate makeup of our being, and learn our unique way of weaving love into our daily lives then it really starts to shift things. In the integration of our various layers - lie signposts and signals as to where to find the alchemy of transformation.

My story starts as a journey of loss, grief, and trauma, and ultimately leads to a heart cracked wide open to love. I promise it won’t leave you sad if you’ll stick it out.

Like me, many families and loved ones of chronically ill or terminal patients are completely blind-sided by the difficulties and the joys of caregiving. The most important thing I wish I had known is that caregiving is a marathon, not a sprint. Like most caregivers, I sprang into action, willing to do anything and everything to help my mom recover. I’m embarrassed to admit how much I believed that my mom’s well-being depended on me being some kind of crazy Energizer Bunny Super Hero.

The number of deaths the pandemic has caused is a staggering number that has affected both direct loved ones and the extensive healthcare workers that served those we have lost and their families.

There is no easy death or grief process, but what I have learned is that there is a way to get to the other side- you have to be willing to move through the grief. The one thing I’m sure of is that avoidance doesn’t work.

Have you ever wondered what would be truly helpful to bring to someone grieving? Everyone is tempted to bring high content sugar baked goods as a comfort food, but there are some alternatives that will do the job better. Sugar might feel good at the moment but leaves us often feeling worse afterward.

The healer told me she thought my problem was grief. She suspected that someone important to me had died and I’d never grieved them. We agreed that I’d think about it and I’d return in a few weeks prepared to release the grief I felt. I worried that if I didn’t know who or what I was grieving specifically it might not work.

I’m sitting in one of my favorite restaurants buttering up a piece of crusty bread, fresh from the oven, and BAM, it hits me like a tidal wave, a sob from somewhere deep in my soul.