Do you trap yourself in B&W thinking too sometimes?

I got a message from the universe a couple times this week.  It said, “Notice your all or nothing, black and white responses to life and how it is shaping them.”  OK, I used quotes to be dramatic, but although it wasn’t a voice, it was loud and clear.  And you know what?  I realized that I was cutting off so many, many possibilities because of this.  Not the most life affirming choice! LOL

So what does B&W thinking look like AND what is the antidote to it?

It looks like: 

  • There are only 2 options or outcomes to this situation: it’s good or bad
  • I believe I have to have it exactly X way or it is doomed, won’t work or is a failure
  • I usually have a dramatic reaction - (a sort of freak out in response to something not going the way I hoped because, I’m holding it in a way that is very rigid)
  • I can’t see other alternatives easily, so I get fearful or down
  • I haven’t even been curious about what else might develop

Proposed antidotes when you catch yourself doing it:

  • Be gentle with yourself, “ahh I see I’m doing that thing again… and life isn’t an all or nothing equation”
  • Relax and calm your fears, “it’s ok that I got afraid, but I don’t have to stay in fear, there are always many outcomes to any situation”
  • Consider jotting down the 2 extreme “good” and “bad” outcomes or options and play with making a list of what might lie in between them
  • Consider getting curious and asking questions (if anyone else is involved) to learn more about your assumptions and what  you may have missed
  • Sit with the idea that infinite possibilities exist - breathe and choose to open to them
  • Remember you can’t always see the forest for the trees and choose to trust

These types of choices will loosen your mind and open you up to a more powerful, easy, interesting and... loving path.  

GIve it a go and and enjoy the new possibilites!