The Unbearable Twins of Love & Loss

By Laura Smith Biswas

My local community and family has been on a very tough journey the past few days.  One of our beautiful young women, my daughter Kalika’s best friend, Gabriella died suddenly from what appeared to be a simple illness.  It has been an outpouring of shock, disbelief and heartbreak all around.  We are grieving not just for our own separation from her but even more for Gabriella’s family and their insurmountable loss.  

I have been overly acquainted with death in my life, having had 3 immediate family members die young.  And as we talked about loss, grief and love at home, I was reminded of:

  • How being human is an outrageously vulnerable experience that calls for great compassion 
  • It takes great courage to allow ourselves to feel the depth of emotions that surface in the face of personal loss of this magnitude
  • How little we can protect ourselves from loss and how there is a temptation to shut down instead of holding the heart open 
  • How in the end, the experiences of love are the most profound moments of life
  • There is no true regret in loving, opening the heart or sharing ourselves honestly with others
  • Even in the face of unbearable pain, do we not just wish we had loved even more?

May this dear girl in our community remind you to keep your heart open to continue to love no matter what fears or obstacles you face.  

We miss you sweet Gabriella.